Struggle

I know, I know, it's been forever! I'll admit, going from one child to two was a bit of a challenge for me. Add to that moving twice and a husband starting a graduate program, and I let a few things slide. This blog was obviously one of them. During that time I've also been struggling with what I want this blog to be. I feel like it started going in a direction I wasn't too sure I wanted it to go. Finances. While finances are definitely a huge part of family relationships, they are not the only part. I want this blog to be about all things that strengthen our families. So I am still on a search of how to adequately do that while devoting the time to my family they need. I'm not making any promises, but hopefully there will be more frequent posts from here on out. Perhaps a blog makeover as well. Slowly but surely I'm hoping to get this back to where I envisioned it going in the first place.

For tonight, here's a quote for you that I've been pondering lately. It comes from a book that I would highly recommend, As A Man Thinketh. It is by James Allen and not a long book. But, it is so full of thought provoking insight into life that it takes me longer to read than other books of it's length.

"A noble and Godlike character is not a thing of favor or chance, but is the natural result of continued effort in right thinking, the effect of long-cherished association with Godlike thoughts."

It is true that our thoughts determine our character and our actions. I love this idea also because it serves as a reminder that anything worth achieving takes effort, sometimes more effort than we may feel we posses, and consistency. It applies to all good things, but I've been thinking about it lately in relation to motherhood.

I loved school and would love to go on and get an advanced degree. I would love to get a job where I feel like I'm contributing to society. There is something so exhilarating about achieving measurable goals. There is something so attractive to me about those kinds of goals. But, I am a mother. I was taught, and do believe, that a mother is necessary in the home. There are many women who juggle school (I've done it), or work while raising children. Some do it out of necessity. As much as I would like to be one of those women, I cannot. I personally cannot do those things and be the mother I need to be to my children.

And for that reason motherhood has been, at times, a struggle for me. I'm sure I'm not the first :) Sometimes I find it hard to feel fulfilled or to feel like I'm achieving goals. Motherhood requires the development of 'a noble and Godlike character' which can appear a daunting task. However, this thought (and all of those in the book) remind me that my thoughts, determine my happiness. No matter what my stage in life, single, married, student, working, retired, aunt, mother, or any combination, I determine my own happiness through the way in which I think about life because the way I think about life is the way I will live my life.

I loved this book and I'm pretty sure you will too. If you've read it let me know what you thought, if you haven't, I would highly recommend getting it because it's one of those that you may want to read over and over.

Another Freebie

I love anything free, of course, but especially something like, The Essential Baker: The Comprehensive Guide to Baking with Chocolate, Fruit, Nuts, Spices, and Other Ingredients. Yum, it looks delicious and I hope to win it, but I thought I would give you all the opportunity as well :)

Go here to see the details of the giveaway and be sure to check out their website as well. In their own words, they are,

"two friends (a linguist and a photographer) living, working, and more importantly, eating and cooking. This blog will be dedicated to our experiments, successful and otherwise, cooking and baking anything from appetizers to desserts and everything in between. Look here for a plethora of delicious recipes! They are easy to make and really yummy!"

And it's true, they really are easy and yummy! So check it out and good luck. If you win I would love to hear about it!

Udder Covers

Udder Covers is doing another promotional deal. Go here and click on the pictures to shop, then enter the promo code: onefree

I guess it is boy season because there is only pink left in stock!

Another Reason to Love Target

*Image courtesy of: http://www.nisk.k12.ny.us/va/images/target_logo.jpg

As we learned from this post, couponing is most beneficial when you can double or even triple coupons. Where we live most grocery stores do not do double coupons. It is very sad, but I've come to accept it and to realize that I just have to look that much harder for deals. Thanks to another coupon website, I discovered that Target does it's own set of coupons and will accept manufacturer's coupons in addition to the Target coupons. As if I need another reason to go to Target... but this is a big one. I'm just starting to get back into the swing of couponing and grocery shopping again since we had our baby. Well, the other night we got 2 boxes of Ritz crackers and 2 bottles of Kraft salad dressings at Target for $2. We were planning on getting more things (since it was the last day we could use the Target coupons), however we had a tired toddler and a hungry newborn, which was definitely not a good combination!

If you go to the Coupons link and the Target coupons link (both posted on the right side of this page) you can see which coupons both sites are offering and then you too will have another reason to go to Target.

Looking Spiffy

(Image courtesy: http://stanthonysf.files.wordpress.com/2008/05/clothes.jpg)

In going through my closet to see what I should keep or discard I realized, once again, I am a very sentimental person. I have a hard time getting rid of things, even clothes, that have a history. I had to accept the fact, with some of the pieces, that they would never be worn again and should therefore be tossed. But, for those harder to toss pieces here are a few ideas for holding onto them just a little bit longer.

This gives some suggestions for reviving the look of worn clothing. There were several good ones, such as changing the length of shirt sleeves or skirt lengths for more modern looks, and having shoes dyed to their original color (or I would suggest a different color too if the current one no longer goes with anything in your wardrobe). Something that I have loved owning is a fabric shaver. I had never heard of such a thing until my dad bought one for us and said it was a must have for every closet. I dare say that he is correct. It certainly revives the look of sweaters that look past their prime due to fuzz.

This article deals strictly with tailoring clothes to get more wear out of them. I liked several of the ideas. Cropping jackets, extending skirts, shortening cardigan sleeves (while using the original cuff) and changing the collar of blouses are just a few that I thought I might actually do.

Another idea (that comes from my sister) for hanging onto the memories without hanging onto the clothing is to cut up the clothes and make a quilt. For a year and a half I served a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I will likely not wear those clothes again, but just seeing them brings back so many memories of amazing people and experiences. No matter what the period of life the clothes come from, making a quilt seems like a great way to preserve the clothes (and relive the memories) without taking up space in the closet.

I think the key is to be creative and think outside the box. If you really love an article of clothing and want to hang on to it, or if you're feeling the need to pinch your pennies but want a new look, then try to look at your clothes differently and you might be surprise at what comes forth!

Donate, Ditch, or Sell

(This picture was taken when we broke down while moving across the country - we had a 16 month old and had to wait 6 hours. Lots of fun!)

We have moved a lot in our married life (8 times to be exact) and moved most recently 3 weeks ago. We have been pretty good about not taking junk with us whenever we move but lately we have had the overwhelming urge to simplify our lives by living with only the things we need. So when I read what Sally Allen, owner of A Place for Everything (an organizing service in Golden, Colorado) said in this article, "Chances are, you use only 20 percent of your stuff regularly." it really got me thinking. We decided to test her statement and we have not unpacked all of our boxes in an effort to see what else we can live without. So far, we haven't missed anything. In August our plan is to go through the unpacked boxes and to donate, ditch or sell whatever we don't need and to put in storage those things that will come in handy later in life.

This article helped me feel better about making decisions for what to donate, toss, or try to sell. One thing I learned was that you can email thecdexchange a list of the CD's and DVD's you are trying to part with and they will email back what price (or in store credit) they are willing to offer you. Then you mail them the merchandise and they mail you a check. The whole process is safe (they have Better Business Bureau approval), quick, and easy.

This article was especially useful in recognizing how to organize your existing space, to get rid of clutter, and how to decide what should be tossed.

I thought Vicki Norris (president of Restoring Order, organizing company in Portland Oregon) gave sound advice in the article when she said, "Walk through your house with a pen and a notebook, writing down the activities that take place in each room and the items associated with those activities. "Then 'purpose' your space." I love the idea of each room having a purpose or a theme (or multiple which seems more likely with kids). I think that would help me a lot even in the buying process. If it doesn't fit into a room, it seems less likely I would buy it.

My goal is to someday have a house where everything has a purpose and a place. Hopefully I can teach my kids the same principle for their bedrooms - wish me luck!

New

We've been otherwise detained moving into a new house and having a baby. Good times! This coming week should find new posts. Probably with an organization/decluttering theme. It's good to be back and we'll see you soon!

Guest Blogger: Tiffany

Tiffany is a busy mother to 2 girls and her husband is going to school full-time to get an MBA. She is an incredibly savvy shopper who always gets a deal, so she seemed ideal to post on clipping coupons! Here's what she says:

There are three types of couponing shoppers. The first type are quick to toss them into the trash. The second type use coupons occasionally, when they see something they wouldn’t mind taking a dollar off or saving 20 percent.

And the third type are those I call ultimate couponing shoppers. Each week they anticipate the Sunday papers and store ads. They are ready to dig into the stack of ads and coupons with scissors in one hand and their coupon organizer in the other. They study each store ads matching sales with store coupons and then manufacturer’s coupons. Some of these ultimate couponers even purchase coupons online.

My couponing experience gradually evolved from the first type to the last type. I now consider myself an ultimate couponer and am not shy about announcing my savings to close friends and family. Anytime I walk into a store without coupons I sweat with the feeling of uneasiness, unprepared. Here is the enticing part: During the last three months I purchased over $1,400 worth of groceries but only spent a total of $572 for a family of four.

Tricks of the trade:

Shop in stores that doubles coupons. Ask your grocery store if they double manufacturer’s coupons. If they do, ask what is the limit. Often stores will double manufacturer’s coupons up to $1, meaning they will double coupons that says “Save 50 cents” or less. But also watch for coupons that says, “Do not double.”

Sales + store coupons + manufacturer’s coupons= even more savings! Stores allow you to use a store coupon on top of a manufacturer’s coupon for one item. So… if the store has boxes of cereal on sale buy one get one free at $4 a box and you have a store coupon that takes off $1 and a manufacturer’s coupon that takes off 50 cents, then you end up paying only $0.50 a box. You would get it for free if the store doubles manufacturer’s coupons. Look for store coupons in the front of the store, in their weekly ads, store site online, or printed out with your receipts. It will have the store name on the coupon.

Only buy it if it saves you money. Manufacturers will give you coupons, but there are times when purchasing the generic or store brand is still cheaper than using coupons. Always check. Also, look at the top and bottom of store shelves for deals. “I’m not just selling groceries, I’m selling real estate. Look high and low - literally - for good values from smaller manufacturers who can’t afford to stock their products in the eye-level sweet spot” (Reader’s Digest, March issue, Thirteen Things Your Grocer Won’t Tell You).

Carry a calculator. “Be wary of “specials.” When people see signs with numbers - ‘8 for $10’ ‘Limit: 5 per customer’ - they buy 30 to 100 percent more than they otherwise might have” (Reader’s Digest, March issue, Thirteen Things Your Grocer Won’t Tell You). And use it in the store to figure out exactly what you will pay for individual items at the register with the sales and after coupons. It may not be as much as you thought it would be.

Just because you’re getting a good deal doesn’t mean you need it. So what if you are getting broccoli for $0.30 a head. If your family doesn’t eat broccoli, then you’re just wasting money and space in your refrigerator. “You’ll end up tossing 12 percent of what you buy” (Reader’s Digest, March issue, Thirteen Things Your Grocer Won’t Tell You).

Shop with a list and stick to it. Know exactly what you are going to buy before even going into the store so you don’t end up with a bunch of stuff you don’t really need. “‘The more products you see, the more you are likely to buy,’ says Marion Nestle, author of What to Eat. ‘That’s why the aisles are so long and the milk is usually in the far corner’” (Reader’s Digest, March issue, Thirteen Things Your Grocer Won’t Tell You).

Use the internet. Retailmenot.com is a site where you can find coupons for just about any major retail stores. Shortcuts.com is where you can download coupons onto your store cards (Kroger, Smith’s, etc.). There are many more other sites and forums with people helping each other find deals online or in stores.

Get on email lists and birthday clubs. Go to retailers, manufacturer’s, and restaurant sites and sign up for their email lists and birthday clubs. They often will email you coupons and notify you of sales. Stores may send you a coupon and restaurants give out free meals or desserts for your birthday. Don’t forget to sign up your kids at children’s stores.

Buddy up. I have a friend who is into saving money just as much as me. We notify each other when we find great deals on things.

To become an ultimate couponer may not be your goal, but hopefully these tips can still help you save a few dollars here or there. If you are interested in turning into an ultimate couponer, remember it takes time, work, and practice. But the amount of money you will save will be monumental to your personal finances.

Great Deal!

A great blog for finding out about deals that are out there is Dear Savvy Shopper. She posts about groceries, clothes, decor, and basically, anything that you might need and want that has a price you can live with! Recently she posted about a great deal on Udder Covers (basically the same thing as Hooter Hiders and whatever else people call them). Check it out though, because as I said, it is a great deal! Regularly priced at $32 they are free (except shipping, which was just under $8), so go here to get the promotional code.

Guest Blogger: Ruth

We are continuing money/finance week this week as well, since we have a couple of amazing guest bloggers and other money saving ideas! Here is Ruth to start us off!

Ruth is an amazing mother to 5 adorable children (including twins) ! She and her husband are the ultimate goal setters and she is the perfect person to review the principles that Dave Ramsey puts forth in his book "The Total Money Makeover". Here's what she has to say:

If you want to buy the best ingredients for a strawberry tart, would you head to the hardware store? If you wanted the best advice on which TV to buy would you visit the baby clothing department?

No and no.

The same is true for getting financial advice.

The best way to get out of debt and build wealth is to get advice from someone who did just that—from someone who is out of debt and is wealthy! Keeping in line with many principles found in Elder Marvin J. Ashton’s pamphlet “One for the Money: Guide to Family Finance”, (which you can receive for free, see below) Dave Ramsey’s book “The Total Money Makeover” is a must read!

In “The Total Money Makeover” Dave guides you step by step on how to become debt free through his six “baby steps”. The first steps focus on getting out of debt and the latter steps are geared towards building wealth and helping others.

In following the baby steps, Dave will first teach you the importance of quickly building a $1000 emergency fund to prep you and help cushion the unexpected emergency expenses as you tackle your debt. Next, he advises attacking the smallest debt first while making minimum payments on everything else. After the debt snowball is rolling and all of your debts are paid off except your house, Dave maps out the rest of the course: building a three to six month expense-only emergency fund, paying off your house, funding kids’ college funds, saving for retirement, and giving to others.

In “The Total Money Makeover”, you will also read about Dave’s personal experiences with getting out of debt, along with other people’s personal struggles and successes in their journey to financial freedom.

If you are serious about getting out of debt, and are ready to be debt free in two to three years, you need to follow Dave’s plan. I love “The Total Money Makeover”; I’ve learned the specifics about how to get out of debt quickly and how to build wealth one month at time. Plus, the book is a great motivator and makes me excited to get the paycheck every two weeks so we can pay off our loans! Sacrificing small luxuries and being intense on eliminating debt for just a short time will bring long-term benefits.

After we finished our undergraduate degrees and my husband attended four years of graduate school, we had accumulated about $37,500 in student loans. My husband’s “first job” started in August of 2008. That October, with back-up of a $1000 emergency fund, we started our personal debt snowball. We have paid a little more than $20,000 of the debt off and are on track to being debt free November 2009. To make it even more exciting, we canceled and cut up our credit cards in January.

To make our situation a little more personal: Ranging from newborn to 5 years of age, we have two boys, twin girls, along with our new baby boy who is a preemie in the NICU. Everyone can become debt free in any situation! For our situation, here are some things that my husband and I do together that are quickly helping us to become debt free:

Create a budget every month and stick to it

¡P Review the budget often—it helps me curb spending and impulse buys!

¡P Plan a menu for a whole week before going grocery shopping once a week

¡P Spend $300 a month on groceries (I bake from scratch) and $50 on food storage

¡P Live without cable TV

¡P Rarely go out to eat

¡P Have a decent clothing budget—for us $75 a month works well, and we sure use it!

¡P Part of a family cell phone plan with my sister

¡P Drive a paid-for 1997 mini-van (that is our only vehicle)

¡P Husband will often bike to work

¡P Kept Christmas to a minimum, and we always will (my husband and I didn’t buy each other any presents last Christmas)

¡P No “vacations” this year

¡P Listen to The Dave Ramsey Show—find a station in your area

¡P Communicate

¡P Communicate

¡P Communicate

¡P Did I mention that communication was important?

Communication and goals are very important. Some of our goals are: being debt free this November, saving up a 20% down payment for a house, and being millionaires when we retire.

If you want more reading, I recommend another one of Dave Ramsey’s books, “More Than Enough”. Also, go here and get the free pamphlet, “One For The Money: Guide to Family Finance”. Even shipping is free!

Remember, if you want to become debt free and build wealth, follow the advice of those people who have done just that.

General Conference

We interrupt finance week to share a post on helping kids get the most out of General Conference (I think most of you reading this blog know what General Conference is, but if you don't, go here).

We've heard of all sorts of things to help kids focus during the sessions of General Conference. What we decided to try this year is an idea I got from a friend and I think it will work well for our daughter:

We cut out the pictures of all the General Authorities and General Auxiliary Leaders, put them in various envelopes, and bought a special General Conference notebook. While we're watching conference we'll have our daughter find the picture of the person speaking (we'll provide her with the right envelope since she's so young). Then she can glue their picture into her notebook and take 'notes' or draw pictures to help remind her of what they are speaking about. Obviously, the older she gets the more effective her notetaking will become, but we're hoping this will be a fun way to start her in that direction.


What sort of things do you do for your kids? What have you found to be effective?

Money Saving

For the past 8 months we have been using homemade laundry soap. I know, I know... it sounds very complicated and old-fashioned, but it is quite simple and saves a ton of money!

The initial cost was about $11 to buy the three needed ingredients. I am about due to make another batch, which will last about 4 months. So, over the course of a year I will have spent $11 on laundry soap!

At that time I will have to buy another Fels Naptha bar (only costs $1). The other two ingredients will definitely last over the next year which means for that year we will spend $1 on laundry soap! Obviously, how long each batch lasts will vary according to family size and need, but it is so much cheaper to make it and it is no big deal for me to make it every 4 months.

Here are the three ingredients:

And here are the directions for making it:

Grate 1/3 of Fals-Naptha Bar with cheese grater. Dissolve in 6 cups boiling water. Add 1/2 cup each of Borax and Soda. Stir until dissolved. Divide into halves*. Pour each half into 1 gallon jug. Add water to fill jug. Shake jug before each use and use half cup per load.

*I actually have it in a 2 gallon container so didn't divide it in half but filled it up with water to the two gallon mark.

One For the Money

Sometimes it can be overwhelming to even think about finances, let alone setting up a plan to actually improve them. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has a great pamphlet (20 pages long) that makes finances easy to think about and to change.

It's called One For the Money and you can download it here or here, or pick it up for free at any one of these locations.

Basically it goes over proper money management, developing self-discipline (includes a debt elimination calendar), using a budget, teaching family members (including young children) the importance of work and how to make good decisions, and a few other valuable lessons. It is straight forward and easy to understand, and if finances seem overwhelming it is definitely a great resource to start you off on the right foot.

*If you haven't viewed the video on How-to-get-out-of-debt, scroll down, it's worth it!

Money, Money, Money!

This coming week is going to be devoted to topics involving money! We'll post resources, ideas, and tips to get out of debt, earn and save money, and anything else we can think of that might be useful.

For those of you who would like to contribute your thoughts and ideas to our money week, please email us so we can include you as a guest blogger!

With that in mind here is our first piece of advice (thanks for posting it on your blog Ruth!):

A Learning Experience

Our daughter will be 3 in April and lately we've been discussing ways to teach her the value of money. We want her to realize food, toys, and basically everything we have, gets paid for with hard earned and saved money. We've come up with several ideas, but one that seemed to work quite well for her was actually giving her a dollar and having her spend it.

I went with my sister-in-law to a craft store and gave Victoria a dollar (4 quarters) and told her she could spend it any way she wanted to. She was beyond excited and it didn't take long for her to decide she wanted a container to hold her treasure box coins.

We searched and searched until she felt like she found the perfect container (a little more than a dollar. I didn't mind helping out a little, especially since it was so cute!). When we got to the check-out and I told her to put her dollar on the counter to pay for her container she started crying. She told me the dollar was hers and she wanted to keep it. Which was great because then we got to talk about how she could either keep the dollar or get the container, she couldn't do both. After a few more tears she finally decided to get the container.

The rest of the day she would ask if we had bought certain things throughout the house. At the dinner table she said, "So... all of those things we get at Ikea we have to pay money for!" (I told you we love Ikea at our house). Long story short - I think she understands more than ever why we don't just go out and buy a new toy when one gets broken.

Her new bed... sort of

On Sunday night our daughter begged to have the sides taken off her crib so she could have a big girl bed. After talking to her about some of the rules of big girl beds (i.e. not joining us in bed in the middle of the night and other such things), we took the sides off. She loves it and has slept through the night without any problems. Yesterday I took her to Ikea to officially make it her 'new' big girl bed by having her pick out some bedding for it. This is what her bed looks like now:



To get a pillow, comforter, pillow case and duvet cover cover it was $36. I thought it was a great deal and luckily she chose something that we can use for a boy too.

Things She Loves

Here are a few of the things we've been enjoying lately:

Making snow castles.

The day before we put food coloring in ice-cube trays and they added a fun touch to our snow castles.

Making new hair bows.

My sister-in-law came over and we made a few different styles and colors. They were surprisingly fast and easy to make. And for whatever reason my daughter actually wants to wear them even though she has never liked hair stuff before.

Ikea toys.

She loves the train set and practically lives in the tent (I'm amazed at everything she can put in there - including the train. I'll have to take a picture when I'm not feeling so lazy!). She also can't get enough of her new stool.